Mixed Emotions

I just came back from seeing Dr. A., the pulmonologist, and I'm a ball of mixed emotions.

While the long hoped-for schedule was provided that outlines the weaning process, the details regarding my health are really disturbing.

It turns out that thanks to the prednisone I now have iatrogenic Cushings Disease, aka steriod overproduction, which is causing the moon face.

So, while I am trying to be happy about the 2-month weaning off schedule, it's still two more months of looking weird and lumpy.

On the other hand...there really will be an end to all this.

This according to the National Endocrine and Metabolic Diseases Information Service website:

What is Cushing’s syndrome?

Cushing’s syndrome is a hormonal disorder caused by prolonged exposure of the body’s tissues to high levels of the hormone cortisol. Sometimes called hypercortisolism, Cushing’s syndrome is relatively rare and most commonly affects adults aged 20 to 50.

Cushing's opposite is Addison's Disease, which President Kennedy had, which is a steroid deficiency, and I am in danger of experiencing that as well, as part of the weaning experience. It's really unbelievable. From the same website:

Addison's disease is an endocrine or hormonal disorder that occurs in all age groups and afflicts men and women equally. The disease is characterized by weight loss, muscle weakness, fatigue, low blood pressure, and sometimes darkening of the skin in both exposed and nonexposed parts of the body.

Addison's disease occurs when the adrenal glands do not produce enough of the hormone cortisol and, in some cases, the hormone aldosterone. The disease is also called adrenal insufficiency, or hypocortisolism.

Lucky me, I have so much to look forward to...

And at weigh in today, I realized that I had put on considerable weight over the past few weeks. Nearly all of it above my waist (so far).

Happily, Dr. A. indicated that by the end of August, I should start seeing weight loss.

Finally, despite eradicating sweets and most fruits out of my diet, the glucose reading was high. I allow myself one fruit a day, and maybe a no-sugar Weight Watcher's type treat. Dr. A indicated that he wasn't judging me. The high level is also just a bi-produce of Mr. Prednisone. Now, I have to start testing myself regularly, as well.

G-d I wish this was over. I am so tired of being sick.

On the other hand, I'm still here!

Thank you G-d!